I realized tonight that I am clearly in the midst of learning not to run ahead of God.
I feel like Dayne and I are on the brink… we got married, I switched jobs, we found a church, we started getting involved in some groups, we’re reading the Bible, and we’re going to be looking for a house sometime soon (God willing). Friendships and relationships have shifted, our marriage has changed as an entity and it has changed us, our calendar is suddenly empty… it’s all very new and exciting and bizarre and uncertain. There is so much potential.
This is usually the point where I run ahead of myself, of the people around me, and of God — to figure things out, close deals, move ahead, and dream big. I am a planner by nature and am not satisfied with planning a mere step ahead… I like to have at least the next 6 months figured out (it used to be more like six years, so I’ve gotten a little better).
God is teaching me something while I’m reading in Genesis about these patriarchs who walked with God daily – minute by minute, hour by hour. First – I need to slow down. And second – I need to not get ahead of myself, and especially not ahead of God.
This lesson came up in one of my readings this past week: in Genesis 16, Sarai became distressed that she & her husband, Abraham, had not had any children yet, even though God promised them descendants. So she told Abraham to sleep with her servant so that they could have children. He did, and Sarai’s servant (Hagar) had a son, and the situation caused enmity between Sarai and Hagar. Eventually, Hagar fled from Sarai’s mistreatment. Broken relationships and sin resulted from Sarai’s rushing ahead of God, which was rooted in her distrust of His plan.
I want to receive the best God has for my husband & me, and that will come as a result of seeking Him first, trusting His plan and his timing, and faithfully walking with Him.
I hope I will continue to focus on this and take things a little slower than I usually do… I know Dayne would appreciate it! And I might have time to appreciate and receive all that God’s giving me, showing me, and teaching me right now.